In Defense of the Chain: The Case of UNO Chicago Grill

I’ll be honest with you; I like chain restaurants.

Sure, it’s easy to get caught up in the ideal of a “mom and pop” small business and claim it has some kind of inherent superiority in terms of service or preparation, but I’ve eaten at enough local dives in my day to know that there are plenty of “hometown favorites” which are overpriced and staffed by rather surely individuals. By the same token, I’ve eaten at enough chains — and worked at one, actually — to know that quality, service, and damn good food doesn’t discriminate when it comes to the amount of locations a brand has to offer.

Such can probably be said for UNO Chicago Grill.

I’ve been eating at UNO Chicago Grill for as long as I can remember, and I’ve had nothing but good memories and experiences at the namesake chain of the famous landmark for Deep Dish. Ironically, I’ve never actually had their Deep Dish pizzas, but I have always enjoyed their fantastic thin crust pies, including the BBQ Chicken. Going to UNO’s was a yearly event for my family on Christmas Eve when I was younger, as we’d swing by Union Station in Washington D.C. before a showing of Dickens’ classic A Christmas Carol at Ford theatre. I would always get the BBQ Chicken Pizza, and I would always finish it. And I would never, ever, let my dad steal a slice.

Since those days I’ve branched out a little when it comes to ordering, but my experiences at UNO’s have remained nothing but positive. Whether it’s been reconnecting with old high school friend’s or meeting my parent’s for dinner after flying back from Utah, on each occasion I’ve been to UNO’s these has been reason to celebrate. And, unlike a recent trip to a high-end Italian “original” in downtown Ellicott City, my meals have always been excellent at UNO’s.

Most recently I decided to go to UNO’s and try out their Chopped Power Salad. It might be a little trite to be writing about a salad given the perennial January theme of eating healthy, but after stopping over from the YMCA after a run, I was basking in that whole healthy aura of wanting something wholesome, filling, delicious, and you know the drill. The salad sounded like just the ticket:

Grilled chicken, spinach, tomatoes, carrots, feta, red grapes, goji berries, raisins, soy nuts, almonds, pepitas, Ocean Spray^® Dried Cranberries, fat free vinaigrette

That’s quite the garden of stuff. I have no idea what a goji berry is (it sounds like something from Yoshi’s story) and I’m still not exactly sure if I identified the berries within the salad, but after arriving on my table not five minutes after placing my order, I was stunned at the fantastic colors and beautiful presentation of what can only be described, in the immortal words of Elaine Benes, as a “big salad.”

It wasn’t just one of the most filling and most aesthetically pleasing salads I have ever been served, it was also one of the most balanced and complete in tastes and textures. There’s a lightness and freshness from the spinach, plenty of crunch and nutty flavor from the almonds, soy nuts, and pepitas, and just the right balance of sweet and tart provided by the various fruits. To round it all out, the Feta — slightly bitter and salty, with a crumbly texture that finds its way into every corner of the salad — and the Chicken bring a completeness which left me satiated far before finishing the entire salad. I can’t emphasize how much I enjoyed the wide-ranging fruits and vegetables used in this salad. There are classic pairings like carrots and raisins that work in perfect unison with the cranberries and tomatoes, while the juicy, plump chicken breast exuded a mild grilled flavor that’s didn’t overwhelm the salad. The best part was the sheer abundance of grilled chicken chunks, which seemed to appear beneath every turn of the fork into the salad. If there’s one flaw in the salad it’s that the vinaigrette is a bit dull. But with the sheer plethora of ingredients and sweeteners within the salad, it’s an afterthought dressing that can afford to be an afterthought.

I suppose I could say something snarky about how the 51 grams of sugar in the salad isn’t really healthy, but I’m not buying that notion. Given the sheer abundance of vegetables and fruits, you’re basically covering a days worth of produce eating, while the balance of protein and heart-healthy fats give truth in advertising to the salad’s namesake. At $11.99 it’s a complete meal, and another winning entre delivered by a staff in timely fashion and in a professional, courteous manner.

Kolache Kreations — Ellicott City, MD

I can’t exactly remember when Kolache Kreations opened. It might have been when I was in high school. It could have been when I was in college. It was, most certainly, at a time when I was either driving or running right past it, making my way up the intersection of 144 and 40 that I’ve confronted for the better part of the past 12 years of my existence.

Past the Kiwanis Wallace Park where I once threw a temper tantrum on the baseball fields as a seventh grader playing fall ball, but not quite to the Arby’s where I used to review stuff for GrubGrade at, sits the blue facade of a small building I think was once an antique store. It’s a homey looking building. Without the large sign over the awning or cars out front, you might mistake it as a grandmother’s house. I’m quite sure, during many of those initial days after opening when I drove past it, I thought just that.

I’ve been inside the store before — mostly as a stop-in for a breather during long runs up and down the route 144 corridor. I’ve rarely had money with me though, and even if I did, I didn’t feel like eating. It’s a good four miles from the store to my parents’ house, and I’d rather not barf on the way home. Besides, something about the alliteration of the Czech pastry specialty and the usually empty looking store just made me want to window shop there bites.

A few months ago I got around to trying my first Kolache. Google searches had long ago revealed that the odd-sounding word has less to do with a Furby and more to do with pastries, in this case a kind that has been transplanted from central europe to the fine state we call Texas. Made with both sweet and savory fillings, the Kolaches at Kolache Kreations range between 2-4 bucks, but thanks to some bold advertising, can sometimes be picked up for free with a coupon in the mail. I had my first one in November – a Sausage and Cheese Kolache. I didn’t think much of the filling, to be honest. The sausage seemed mild and didn’t exude a distinctively sweet or spicy flavor, while the cheese came off as a bit too processed and plain. Unimpressed by the filling as I was, I couldn’t help but feel welcomed by the man inside the store, and the warmth and pride he exuded in his own little piece of international yummy. And if there was a redeeming quality to the taste of the Kolache itself, it was the dough itself. Buttery yet sweet, with a buttermilk taste of a pancake yet the chew and body of a quickbread, it seemed to encapsulate every kind of bread product I have ever eaten. I knew I had to return.

A few days ago I stopped by around midday. This time I decided to go with one of the sweet Kolaches. Seeing choices of cream cheese, apricot, and poppy-seed (all adorned with a struesal topping) I was flummoxed as to which one to choose, but considering I had never had the sweet poppy-seed paste I sometimes see in the bakery section, I decided to use my coupon to pick one up.

The dough was even better than what I remembered. Sweet and milky, like a cross between a yeast raised cinnamon roll, a biscuit, and  my Grandma’s classic “Easter Bread” — made, I should add, with whatever “Oleo” is – its the kind of bread dough that refuses to let you swallow it without savoring it’s complex and comforting tastes. Im sure itwould have the same effecton one’s arterie’s if eaten too much, but alas, that’s what makes it so good.

Next time I stop in I’m determined to get a different flavor, because after trying the Poppyseed filling, I’ve concluded that I’m not a poppy seed kind of guy. It’s not bad, it’s just, well, it’s just not what I’d pair with the dough. nd that’s really the magic of the Kolache — the dough. It’s a worth a try, especially if you’re looking for something more complex than your typical Einstein Brothers bagel and schmear.

Wegmans’ Hometown Burger with Truffle Oil Green Beans

For as much as I rave about Wegman’s and their bakery you’d think I’d be a regular when it comes to purchasing hot foods in the veritable food court of the Columbia store.

I’m not. Actually, I’ve only sampled from their wokery hot food bar once, loading up on a cloying combination of tofu, vegetables and peanuts in some asian sauce. That’s not to say I haven’t made the rounds around the store though. But they just never seem to be selling the kind of pizza I really crave, or the price just isn’t right or heck, or I’m just stuffed from one to many rolls and trips to the Coke Freestyle machine.

Last Friday was different though. I had been on the phone most of the day with one of the designers for this magnificent work of naval reference and had managed to get through the morning and most of the afternoon on nothing but coffee, oatmeal and protein powder. I was famished by the time four came around, and mostly I just wanted to taste something.

I stopped off at Wegman’s coming home from work. Wegman’s Food Bar offers a $6 Meal Deal with various options, including their 1/4-lb Hometown Burger, a side, and a small drink. I feel like an idiot for not asking if the burgers come cook to order, but in any case, mine came out done. Not “grilled to a hockey puck well done”, but there wasn’t any pink inside. I also got the green beans on the side, mostly because of those flashing lights of “Truffle Oil.”

The Burger — with American cheese — was good. Not quite In-N-Out good, but the meat had a really good crust from the sear, and the guy working the griddle did a great job of melting the cheese, which oozed a gooey, fatty layer. I asked for tomatoes and lettuce to be added and they didn’t charge me extra – which I like – but they left also left off the pickles and hot sauce the burger is supposed to come with.

Wegman’s advertises their beef as “irradiated.” Apparently it’s just a fancy way to ensure bacteria get killed off so the meat can be cooked to order. I don’t know if it made the burger taste any better, but there was something more, gosh, ‘natural’ tasting about the meat. At first I thought it may not be seasoned as enough, but after tearing a few crusty pieces off I realized the meaty, sweet backtones had adequate salt and pepper. Like I said, I liked it fine, although a little too densly packed for my tastes.

I wasn’t crazy about the bun. It wasn’t toasted and seemed like the kind of bulk enriched bun they sell for 1.25 in eight-packs for backyard cookouts. Knowing Wegman’s bakery, I really expected better, even for “just” the 1/4-lb burger (they also have a 1/2-lb burger.) At the very least, throw me a pre-packaged potato bun.

The green beans tasted like green beans. They didn’t taste special — actually, I barely noticed they were seasoned. I had to add salt to them and I didn’t pick up any truffle flavor, even though they did have an oily sheen. I would have guessed they had a drizzle of plain canola oil if they hadn’t been advertised with Truffle Oil.

I didn’t get the meal because I wanted a side, but rather because I was a craving a refillable soda for while I was shopping. I’m a diet soda drinker through and through, so the Coke Freestyle machine is kind of a big deal. A few fills of Coke Zero Vanilla are always in order, but I also like the Freestyle because you can essentially get the same soda with Caffiene Free Diet Coke (Vanilla) and also Mr. Pibb and Barq’s, both of which are seriously underrated soda’s with bite.

At 6 bucks the burger “meal deal” is not a bad value for a light dinner, especially if you put a premium on the Coke Freestyle machine, which I do. While the green beans were a big disappointment and the burger, as a sum of its part, could have been stronger, Wegman’s reputation for high quality beef and freshness definitely is followed through at their food bar, making a return trip — possibly for some sweet potato fries and a unique Veggie Burger — a real possibility.

The McDouble — A College Football Analogy

The McDouble is like Notre Dame. It’s tried and true — a fixture of the fast food scene, just as the midwestern Catholic school is a fixture of the college football landscape. It’s enduring, well followed, and it’s on everywhere. Turn on your radio in Albuquerque or West Friendship and you’ll be getting the same appeal to the cheapo inside of you to buy the two beef patties with good old American slice for just a buck, just as you can turn on your TV to any NBC station throughout America to pick up a Notre Dame football game.

Both have loyal followings. Rabid, some would claim. The followers swear by, uphold it, and defend it against all doubters and haters. Oh, and are there ever haters. “It’s two hocky pucks and tasteless, semi-melted cheese” they say. “Are you kidding me, Notre Dame’s schedule consists of Navy and Army,” they make note, asking when the last time the Irish actually mattered was. Pointing to other menu items, or teams, which are better represented in today’s “premium” trend of fast food or SEC-dominated college football landscape, it could be argued that both the McDouble, and the Irish, are in decline.

Manti Te’o and the 2012 Notre Dame football team would argue differently. I’ll be straight-up in that I had my doubts coming into the year. But with their 4-0 start, Notre Dame deserves their status in the Top 10 of the latest AP poll. This is a dominating defense, and one which does not quit despite knowing full well it can’t always get help from the offense. And that offense, under either Everett Golson or Tommy Rees, is doing something it rarely has done over the last few season — namely, avoiding making enough mistakes to lose games. I know the season is only a third of the way done, but after being skeptical coming into the year, I’m buying the Irish.

I’m also buying the McDouble after trying it for the first time last week. I know. Having gone 23 years without eating one of fast food’s most iconic items is like going 23 years as a college football fan without actually watching a Notre Dame football game, but curiosity and a stingy but growling stomach finally got the best of me.

I don’t know how much longer the McDouble will last at a dollar given the upcharge for the “Daily Double” that many McDonalds’ have adopted. Just as I don’t know how long Notre Dame can last as a power player in college football. I hope they lasts forever though. Why does the McDouble work? Heck, why does Bob Diaco’s defensive scheme work? It just does, that’s why.

Maybe it’s Te’o. He’s your beef, he’s got to be. Yes, the patties are small, but there’s two of them, and despite their small size and well done nature you seem to be hit with an altogether beefy taste with those characteristic sweet notes on the backend. Can you say sideline to sideline? Of course there’s help. That cheese – bulky, mishapen – that’s Stephon Tuitt. A one man wrecking crew inside, the cheese is waxy and unrefined at first. But give it a quarter (ok, 15 mins steaming in the wrapper on a hot day) and it gets melty and gooey and serves that essential component of being that salty-fatty-awsome binder so essential to cheeseburger construction. To continue the analogy, Tuitt, the big cheese if you will, plugs up the middle to allow Te’o to shine.

Now, don’t forget your supporting cast. I’m talking Danny Spond, whose timely big plays hits you like the umami and vinegar blast of a pickle and chopped onion. Or that hard-hitting, omnipresent Zeke Motta – that would be your sweet and salty ketchup — coming in to add a needed zing just when the defense needs an open field stop. And that bun, that squishy, sweet, slightly malty bun which combines flavors and textures in the general mess of mechanical digestion I like to call chewing — well, that’s everyone else. From Prince Shembo on the line to cornerback  Bennett Jackson, it works together and gets the job done, allowing the stars to shine but also contributing the needed glue to hold it all together.

Not actual glue though. That would be gross. And the McDouble? That magnificent, cheap, but of just so good value hamburger amidst a sea of bigger and faster hamburgers? Wake up the echoes my friend, because if September has shown us anything, it’s that that relevance is far from lost.

Pumpkin Season Has Arrived

It started last weekend when I had my prerequisite right of fall eating with a Pumpkin Bagel with Pumpkin Schmear, but it didn’t end there. I’ve been spotting a veritable buttload of pumpkin eats over the last week, including Kellogg’s infamous Pumpkin Spice waffles, as well as new Archer Farms Pumpkin Muffins and my beloved Edy’s Pumpkin Ice Cream. Word is, even Panera Bread is getting a Pumpkin Bagel.

I may be no Scott Sevener, but I do love me some pumpkin (speaking of which, can a guy get a pumpkin pie flavored cereal, please?). For no other reason than the love of all things orange, I’m more or less intent on documenting each of these finds, starting with my beloved Einstein’s Bros. Pumpkin Bagel and Schmear.

This is no donut in disguise, mind you. It’s everything you want in a bagel — chewy on the outside, warm and bready with lots of air pickets and pull-apart, yeasty dough, within – with a hint of fall spice and just malty sweetness. The cream cheese schmear is a bit on the vicious side, but it has a sweet, creamy flavor that reminds me of a pumpkin mousse. Actually, it reminds me of a better, richer version of my Grandma’s pumpkin mousse, which might just be the greatest dessert ever created for Weight Watchers.

Anyone else a pumpkin fan with some early fall eats and treats? How about other fall flavored treats? Let me know your picks for the ones to check out!

Week One Eats

Before the Boise State game on Friday I stopped by Arby’s to get one of the new Turkey Roaster’s to review for The Impulsive Buy. For $4.75, I did not enjoy it. More on this later in the week..

…But I did enjoy Burger King’s new Raspberry Smoothie, although I don’t know if I’d pay more than a buck for it. Obviously hyper-sweet, it still had a nice tartness, and considering I was picking little raspberry bits from by teeth an hour later, made for a good post-workout sugar rush that tasted of more than pure sugar. The berries looked like they came in frozen puree form, and I didn’t detect any dairy taste, but if BK keeps using any excuse to offer stuff for a buck on long weekends, I’m down. I hope they do this soon with their new Italian Chicken items.

I had this grand plan to grill hot dogs for breakfast on Saturday morning when Navy played Notre Dame. But I got back late from a run and just decided I wanted some ice cream. I gave the Edy’s Slow Churned Triple Cookie Sundae a chance and was really impressed. I don’t think I’ve had a cookie dough ice cream since my nightly bowls of Aggie Ice Cream a few years ago, but despite being a low fat ice cream, the cookie dough peices had a great molassas-brown sugar-butter flavor. The brownie bits were surprisngly fudgy too. All in all, this ice cream cone salvaged the morning (Navy lost 50-10.)

Watching Navy lose turns me into a freaking domestic. After making black bean burgers from scratch on Saturday night, I ended up putting some over-ripe bananas to task on Sunday. My family has a buttload of old Cooking Light magazines sitting around, and given the amount of peanut butter in the pantry, it made sense to try out this recipe for Peanut Butter Banana Bread. I decided to make them in muffin form though, mostly on account of convenience and not wanting to dry out the bread. I subbed out the flax seeds and cut some of the sugar (used a honeyroasted  peanut butter) but overall I thought it was a pretty good “light” recipe. No gummy textures or overly healthy taste. Worth a try if you’re into the whole baking thing.

One of the best parts about the opening weekend of college football is that it just keeps giving. It’s often compared to Christmas, but starting on Thursday night and going to Monday, it’s more like Hanukkah. Monday night, for instance, featured a game between Georgia Tech and Virginia Tech. I could usually care less about the ACC, but when Chick-fil-A sponsors the game and offers free sandwiches to jersey-wearing fans visiting their outlets, well, just paint me the biggest fan Georgia Tech ever had. Or Navy. Whatever. I rocked the Navy jersey and got a sandwich. I think I’ve mentioned it before, but I think the best way to enjoy the classic is with extra pickles, two packets of black pepper, Texas Pete Hot Sauce, and a packet of honey. Actually I don’t think this. I know this.

All in all, it was a solid first weekend of college football. Navy may have lost, but I’m cautiously optimistic for when Utah comes to Logan on Friday night. Not sure what I’ll be stuffing my face with on Friday night, but you can beat my ass will be parked on the sofa watching ESPN2 when 8 PM rolls around.

Week One Observations

I spent the better part of the best years of my life writing about college football (and for that, they pretty much turned out to be the most unhappy years of my life), so like it or not, I’m subjecting you to my thoughts from each week’s action. DEAL WITH IT.

Games I Watched

Notre Dame 50, Navy 10

• After years of working as a credentialed beat writer covering Navy athletics, I’ve come to mentally cringe every time Navy plays in a game on national television (read: not CBSCS.) Like the Army-Navy game and every ESPN game, the attention paid to the Navy football team bordered more on what it represents than what it is. We all know the clichés about hard-work and physicality and being great student athletes and Americans; but can we actually talk about what’s going on on the field?
• What was going on on the field was about what I expected. Scratch that, it was worse. I somehow forced myself to watch the entire game, but between seeing the Navy defensive front give more ground than the Polish cavalry against the Blitzkrieg and Trey Miller taking snaps from the shotgun, I nearly lost my sanity.
• If Navy can’t find a way to commit to running the actual triple option with, key phrase, the first option (fullback dive) being established, it’s going to be a long season. After hearing all about him all summer, it was disappointing to see that Noah Copeland was a complete non-factor.
• Gary Danielson said some absolutely stupid things during the broadcast, but he hit the nail on the head when he summed up how the Navy coaches handled the end of the first half. Try’s fumble killed any spark the team might have been able to recover, and not taking a time out to give Miller a breather wasted a gutsy performance from  first-year starter.
• If I’m a Notre Dame fan (and I am, kind of) I am feeling pretty good. I know most Navy fans hate the Irish, but as a Catholic and as someone who enjoys the play of real or semi-real student athletes, I can’t help but pull for the school against most opponents. Not Navy, mind you, but pretty much everything else. I thought the Irish O and D-lines were dominant, and hope Saturday wasn’t all on Navy just sucking.

 Ohio 24, Penn State 14

• The people I discuss college football with tend to think Penn State’s football program should be banished like those dudes in the floating mirror in outerspace from that one Superman movie, but my thoughts are more conflicted. Seeing Beaver Stadium on Saturday, and seeing the emotion in the eyes of the Penn State athletes, I’d be lying if I said a part of me was not pulling for them.
• Of course, I was also pulling for Ohio, which I like for no other reason than the combination of Tyler Tettleton and Beau Blankenship. What can I say? As a short white dude myself, I tend to have a politically incorrect tendency to pull 5-foot-8 white running backs. SUE ME.
• Looking at some of the other MAC teams which played major BCS opponents Saturday (and looking at their collapses) I attribute Ohio’s success to one factor; coaching. Frank Solich is the kind of guy who can keep a team of 21 year-old cool and collected. Even when down, his plauers knew they could win the game, and didn’t press. Lucky bounces, I think, often go towards the team which stays composed. And a composed, well coached team can make some serious noise later in the season.

Utah State 34, Southern Utah 3

• I don’t think anyone who closely follows USU — not the least of whom is this former Aggie Sports Editor — was surprised at the play of Joe Hill. We Aggie fans have been spoiled with Robert Turbin and Michael Smith for the last four years, but any one keeping an eye on the pipeline knew their was talent behind them. Kerwynn – we called him ‘Hey Arnold’ when I was in Logan because they teased him for having a football shaped head – was solid, and both he and Hill will keep the Aggie ground game humming. Both are fast, shifty, and have great vision, but their surprising power will catch teams off gaurd all year. Oh yea, Chuckie Keeton was pretty swell, too, and don’t overlook that offensive line.
• Matt Austin might just be the most fundamentally sound wide receiver in the country when it comes to body country and sideline awareness. And no, that’s not a homeristic statement.
• I was worried how the offense would look in terms of tempo and design with Dave Baldwin moving on to Colorado State, but Matt Wells seems to have everything under control. The thing I love about the “power spread” and the way USU runs it is it keeps other teams so off-tempo. Baldwin used to tell me the offense ”is complex, not complicated,” and I like the way he describes it. With all the different packages and formations, it makes defenses play off-balance, and imposes a north-south but also east-west hurry-up style of play on you. The most important thing for USU moving forward will be ball control. If that can be maintained, there’s no reason this offense can’t be Xbox good this year.

Stock Report

Stock up:

FOX: Gus Johnson calls every game like it’s March Madness. Pair him with Charles Davis, who might just be the most intelligent play-by-play guy in all of college football commentary-dom, and you’ve got the most underrated announcing duo this side of the Joe Tessitore effect.

Nebraska’s running game: Ok, so it was Southern Miss. But the 278 yards (6.2 per) on the ground was impressive given the fact that Heisman candidate Rex Burkhead took to the sideline after only three carries (albeit, one for along touchdown). Ameer Abdullah showed some toughness between the tackles, but most of all, Taylor Martinez looked like he actually knew what he was doing with both his feet and his arm. And later in the season, with Burkhead back and hopefully healthy, you’ve got to think the latter part of that statement will open up thinks for the run game.

Turner Gill: When he was back at Buffalo, Turner Gill was the first FBS head football coach I met and interviewed. At the time, my credentials were that I had graduated high school and had once written a blog about Navy football. Yea, impressive stuff, I know. Yet the man treated me like a veteran, and at that Buffalo practice I attended, I saw first hand the kind of program that Gill looked to create. Most people know he struck out at Kansas, but few know he just coached his first FCS game. And while his Liberty Flames came up a dropped pass short of upending Wake Forest in week one, something tells me the efforts of first-time starter Brian Hudson will have Liberty staying near the top of FCS competition.

Stock Down:

ESPN: I think I saw an Obama commercial between each TV timeout. Never mind for a second that I’m a conservative and consider this; isn’t the beauty of the college football season the fact that we can (kind of) ignore this politics stuff? Way to spoil a Saturday, ESPN.

Savannah State: I’m sure it’s a fine place to go to college and all, but how would you like to be the kid who has to respond to “yea, the team that was blown out 84-0 by Oklahoma State” when explaining where you go to college? Week One games are usually ugly. Like Battle of Hoth ugly. But this was the equivalent of the Death Star blowing up Alderaan.

Navy’s Use of the Shotgun: Did I mention how much I sincerely dislike it?

Coming tommarow…Week One Football Eats

Fast Food on the Cheap: Chick-Fil-A’s Strawberry Sundae

Note: It’s unfortunate I have to preface this post with this kind of introduction, but please know, if you’re going to use this review to air grievances about the perceived political affiliations of a company or its clients, well, then I’m just going to delete it. Ok, on to the cool and creamy stuff.

Having now shed the feckless monotony of calorically dense and money wasting fast food ventures as a reviewer for GrubGrade.com, I’ve adopted a fast food eating style which is based mostly in moderation. The dollar menu, while disappearing at most fast food enclaves, still exists in one form or another from Burgers Kings to Arbys’ everywhere, and still leads me to one or two treats a week. Basically, it keeps me sane, young, and doesn’t kill my wallet. Now that’s a what I like to call a win-win-win.

Of course my favorite fast food chain, Chick-Fil-A, is notorious for never having a value menu to begin with. That all changed recently, when the chain introduced a revamped line of desserts that included ”improved” versions of brownies, cookies, and their signature Icedream soft serve. Unfortunately they nixed one of my favorite desserts (The pie, oh my!) but the famous milkshakes are still front and center.

I stopped into Chick-Fil-A after a long day at work the other day looking for something sweet but not too massive in size, and found it in the .99 cent “Mini Sundae.” Described as a combination of their ”famous vanilla Icedream®, Hershey’s® chocolate syrup, whipped cream and a cherry on top,” I was stoaked to find out I could replace the chocolate syrup with strawberry syrup. I consider that a huge plus, since, for whatever reason, the majority of McDonalds’ I’ve visited never offer the elusive Strawberry Sundae the chain claims to actually sell.

Chick-fil-A’s mini sundae isn’t huge, but it fills the container to the brim, which, in this case, is actually a bad thing. Not only did it get a dude behind me in line to comment, ”cute” when he saw it, but the amount of stuff going on inside the container can make life messy. You see, I couldn’t for the life of me get the top off, and ended up getting my hands sticky in the futile attempt. All the while, my Icedream was melting, and I was losing precious time.  I guess the point is to eat the sundae through the opening, which I ended up doing. It’s good news and bad news on this one. The good news is that Chick-fil-A’s Icedream is better than the standard soft serve sold at most fast food places. It has a creamier and thicker consistency, although it’s not Rita’s frozen custard. I loved the combination of the thick Icedream with the plentiful Strawberry syrup, and liked airy texture and creamy taste of the whipped cream. The Strawberry syrup is definitely on the very sweet side, but vestiges of seeds and a thick glaze give it an almost pie-filling consistency.

Good, stuff, no doubt. Problem was, it seemed like there was more whipped cream than Icedream. I’m not sure if this was just how my sundae was prepared or if the price point of the product calls for less Icedream (seeing the nutrition, I’m guessing the latter) but I really felt like I was eating mostly puree and whipped cream after two or three spoonfuls of Icedream.

All that being said, for a buck, you’re not going to find many better fast food desserts. While I won’t put it in the same league as the elusive (in Maryland, anyways) $1 Small Chocolate Frosty, it’s definitely a good change of pace and of higher quality than McDonalds’ Sundaes. Heck, it’s even pretty healthy with only 170 calories and 2 grams of saturated fat. Only question I have now is whether the “on the menu” version with Hershey’s® syrup is even better?

• Price: .99 cents
• Ranking: 7/10
• Chances I’d Buy Again: 100% (gotta try the chocolate version!)

Ted’s Hot Dogs (Buffalo, NY)

There are currently two tastes in this world which I do not like. Aside from wine and olives, however, pretty much anything is fair game for entering into my belly.

I am told that it wasn’t always this way. Before the days in which I’d boil my own chicken livers and grill up Bison testicles, I eschewed the flavor compounds of All-American staples like peanut butter and jelly, American cheese, and even hotdogs.

Actually, I’m told that I detested hot dogs, which is probably why my earliest memories of Ted’s revolved around grilled chicken sandwiches. In any case, the Western New York institution is famous for its Sahlen’s Hot Dogs, which come in three varieties my family has always raved about (Regular, All Beef, or Jumbo Footlong.) Cooked over an open charcoal flame right in front of you, all of Ted’s sausage offerings develop a blistered, smoky char with a signature taste and crisp snap. The signature Buffalo hot dog is matched only in reputation by the local chain’s hand cut fries and onion rings. And milkshakes. And burgers. And Chicken sandwiches.

Ok, so they do everything good.

I know I must have tried Ted’s hot dogs at some point in my childhood, but my only distinctive memory came from an experience two summers ago when my dad and I checked in. I got an All-Beef dog at the time, and while I liked it, I remember concluding it tasted “like a hot dog,” and chalked up the experience as just a nice lunch with my dad. All this, I should add, after building up the Ted’s experience as the end-all, be-all of meat-in-tubular-form experiences a human being can experience in life. Talk about a letdown.

I don’t know what it is about Ted’s, but there’s a lure in my mind and spirit that attracts me to the chain every time I’m in the area. Maybe it’s the repressed sense of not carrying about nutrition, or maybe its memories of childhood experiences that drive me, but for whatever reason, I concluded that I truly had to eat at Ted’s while on a recent trip to Buffalo. Thankfully, I had two hungry cousins of college-age to take help make that urge become a reality.

My cousins Michael and Nick went with a footlong dogs and fries (I made them promise to share) and I got a regular dog. After watching my dog grill up by a surely man who said it “would not be cool” if I took a picture of him grilling my dog after I asked (he allowed me to take a picture of the hot dog, however) I was asked about what kind of condiments I wanted. The girl was patient enough while walking me through the toppings, and I finally decided on ketchup, mustard, diced onions, a pickle, and Ted’s signature hot sauce.

Total price: $2.30 plus tax. Slightly more than a Sonic hot dog, and (I hoped) totally worth it.

Not only was it totally worth it, it was, quite simply, probably the best tasting meat-in-tubular form experience I’ve ever had. Granted, there haven’t been a lot, but somehow, the recent trip to Ted’s seemed to capture everything I had ever looked to the chain for, but never experienced on prior visits.

Its starts with that casing, which has a deep charcoal taste and blistering snap, yielding to a salty-fatty-chewy interior. The hot sauce has a great flavor that’s far from just ’hot,’ while the bun’s malty and soft sweetness do a nice job at providing a mesh point for all the flavors.  The fries are a winner as well. Oh who am I kidding, these might just be my favorite fries on the planet. Oh who am I kidding (again) they were DAMN PERFECT. Skin-on, crispy, with a fluffy interior and almost no noticeable surface oil, they’re the kind of fries that should be eaten plain, with only a slow chew to allow the sugars to breakdown and an earthy sweetness to develop on your tongue.

Buffalo is one of the town’s with a lot of iconic foods. Wings and Beef on Weck get all the attention, but any true Buffalonian will tell you the town also has some of the best hot dogs in the country, all thanks to Ted’s and their winning combination of charcoal grilling and Sahlen’s franks. Should you ever find yourself passing through for a Bills game, you’ve got one local chain you’ve just got to hit up.

Three Things and a Damn Tasty Chicken Sandwich

I went to Chick-fil-A on Wednesday. It was kind of a big deal. For many people, it was a political statement. For me, it was anything but.

There’s three things you should know about me, and I guess the first one is that when I was younger I used to tell myself I was against Gay-marriage. That was before I knew gay people. Like most people I know, I’ve liked all the gay individuals I’ve met over the last few years. That they were gay hardly had anything to do with anything. I liked them, as I’ve liked most people I’ve gotten to know, because they were good people. I would hardly consider myself, in any way, anti-gay. At least I hope not, considering how many Ted Allen cookbooks I’ve checked out from the library these last few years.

There’s another thing you should know about me. It’s that I do think there is a basis in natural law for the idea of a traditional family. It’s a sentiment the owner of Chick-fil-A recently reaffirmed. I don’t necessarily agree with the language he used to affirm it, and I don’t know if I agree that opening up the institution of marriage, as defined in a civil way, is tantamount to societal disaster, as Chick-Fil-A’s founder implied. Actually, I think anything but. Like many Americans, I think gay marraige is a complicated issue that I don’t have an easy answer for.

Which leads me to the last thing you should know about me. I like Chick-Fil-A. I like their food, I like their business model, the way they treat employees, and heck, I even like their bathrooms. I think creating a friendly and service driven atmosphere for all customers is commendable, and I also think it’s admirable that a company, with the right intentions and right reasons, supports causes to be in what it believes to be the civic interest. If you don’t agree that those interests are in the civic interest, I am more than happy to accept that. But one shouldn’t be called a bigot or hate-monger for choosing to patronize such a place, or for even finding that kind of position commendable. Especially when there is a well established reason behind that position.

We’re going down a dangerous path in this country, and it starts with the labels. It continues with the fear mongering, and it manifests when people are willing to forsake entire groups of people as their sworn enemy just because of their food or shopping choices. Unless of course that shopping choice includes nothing but New York Yankees paraphernalia. That’s just unacceptable on every level.

Oh yea, and there’s one more thing you should know about me. I like my Original Chicken Sandwich with Texas Pete Hot Sauce and Honey. Try it sometime. You may be surprised to learn something a little different and out of your comfort zone isn’t so bad, after all.