How many times can you reinvent the wheel? More importantly, how many times can you reinvent a barbecue flavor potato chip?
That’s the question I’m asking myself right now. I’ve had baby back rib barbecue chips. I’ve had “Carolina Style” chips. I’ve had Honey BBQ and Chiptole Barbeque, not to mention classic barbecue and smokey smokehouse and smoking sweet barbecue. I’ve had so many kinds of ‘Q chips, I regularly mispell the word in attempting to spell any one of its variations correctly.
Now, I’m munching on the new Wavy Pit BBQ chips from UTZ, and asking myself if we all haven’t just taken this celebration of a distinctly American food trend too far.
These chips are described as “down home,” although I’m not exactly sure what that implies. Here in Maryland our style of ‘Q goes under the pseudonym of Pit Beef or Pit Turkey, and considering I spend the better part of my days working next to one of these open-flame charcoal restaurants specializing in pit meat, I think I’m at least somewhat qualified to judge the chips’ authenticity.
I was a late convert to the Wavy or Ruffle chip game, but the thicker, crunchier, and more aesthetically pleasing style of non-kettle potato chips are, to use a phrase from the kids, where it’s at. That said, these seemed a little less crunchier than the plain Regular UTZ Ruffle chips I had polished off the week before.The initial taste is garlicy to the extreme, with a hint of raw sugar taste. Think pouring a generic barbeque rub on chips, then adding garlic powder. A moderate back-heat accompanies the chips, but it’s not overpowering enough to be considered “hot.” Is there a smokey element here? Perhaps, but it’s nothing to write home about. Given the lack of tomato powder sweetness and vinegar tang, the chips come across as singularly garlicy-salty-kinda sweet, just like, you might surmise, a generic BBQ rub.
I’m not sold on UTZ Pit BBQ chips as a realistic representation of Baltimore pit meat. Actually, I’m not sold on them as anything other than just another run-of-the-mill tasting barbecue chip, and instead recommend one of UTZ’s tried and true favorites — like Sour Cream and Onion or Regular Wavy — if you’re inclined to go down the non-kettle path. As for BBQ chips? I think I’ll just save my tips and head next door to Oakey’s.
There seem to be two distinctive enthusiasts of cereal in this world. The first, of which I consider myself a member, is the kind of serial cereal eater who is captivated by the sheer size and scope by the options arrayed in the catalogue of an cereal aisle. Like the kids in the candy store, we want to try every single cereal, and vacillate daily in our choices. Today Reese’s Puffs. Tomorrow, Frosted Mini Wheats.
On the other end of the spectrum you have the zealots. No less enthusiastic in always having to have a morning bowl, they nevertheless cling to a dogmatic precept of cereal supremacy. More often than not, you know them by other names. Your health freak friend who won’t touch something with high fructose corn syrup or your picky little sister with a singular fixation on a certain fruity rabbit. It’s Cap’n Crunch or take a hike, and don’t try passing off that grocery-store brand imitator for the genuine article.
My mom is one of these people. She insists on cereal and cold skim milk every morning, but despite what usually amounts to about a dozen or so options in our cupboard, she’ll only bother eating one or two.
I don’t dislike the Chex brand, and when I really consider it, I think the Honey Nut version is perhaps second only to Honey Nut Cheerios in the spectrum of Honey Nut cereals. But Chocolate Chex is a different story. I put mom’s favorite to the test last week, and despite her enthusiasm for the mascotless cocoa-powder and rice based cereal, I still find it only O.K., at best
As a snacking cereal it lacks the sweetness and density that I crave. The rice base is almost as boring as regular rice, and even though the non-chocolate Chex pieces have a clean taste, the chocolate pieces seem too salty and lack depth of cocoa flavor. The coating is finger-licking in application and midly sweet, but I can’t get past the relatively mundane chocolate taste once I get past the initial coating. It’s neither bittersweet like Cocoa Puffs nor rich and supersweet like Krave, and I find myself wanting some kind of sheen or faux-smoothness to savor. Alas, the pieces are devoid of any kind of glaze to latch onto, and provide little excitement as a dry snack.
To be fair, Chocolate Chex would be good if all the pieces were covered in the cocoa and sugar coating, but as it stands, the plain rice pieces just don’t seem to add anything. Maybe it’s just me, but the salty-sweet combination of chocolate and corn just strikes me as more natural than chocolate and “whole grain rice.” Whatever the case, I much prefer the Chocolate-Caramel Chex 100 calorie packs if I’m going to be snacking dry. At least those provide a glazed feature with much more pronounced sweet-saltiness and depth.
Oddly enough, I find Chocolate Chex to be one of the few cereals I like better in milk than plain. A lot better. The chocolate coating turns the milk to a sweet and enjoyable brown, while both kinds of chex pieces get a semi-mushy but pleasing quality about them. Even in skim milk I can rush through a bowl, slurping the milk down like I was on the verge of Osteoporosis of something.
Still, it’s not enough to save this cereal from just middle of the pack status. Rarely on sale in my area, it’s not something I’d spring for if mom didn’t have to have it. But she does. So even though I routinely try to “sneak” alternative and in my view much tastier chocolate cereals into our pantry, I find myself constantly returning to Target to reload the shelves.
Chocolate Chex
Price: $2.99 (Target)
Rating: 5/10
Chances I’d Buy Again: 100% (Mom’s gotta get her kicks)
Let’s skip to the point: Lay’s needs to man-up and start making some really ballsing flavors of potato chips. Sour Cream and Onion and BBQ are great and all, but a guy needs to mix it up a bit when it comes to getting his chip fix. I’ve had Sea Salt and Pepper chips. I’ve had “Name Your Spicy” Cheese chips. But until recently I never had Roastin’ Chicken Potato Chips.
As you may know, my buddy Melissa sent me a goodie bag of Canadian snacks a while back. I’m a little ashamed to admit (actually I’m not, but it sounds good, right?) I’ve plowed through most of the candy and chips before giving them the time for a full-out review, but a quick word is in order about the merits of seasoned and cooked poultry in potato chip form.
It just freaking works.
Don’t tell me why it works, and don’t attempt to explain by what feat of science it’s even possible to simulate the flavor of a roasted chicken in a fried spud, but by some bizarre circumstance, our Canadian friends have achieved what few U.S. chip manufacturers can. They have made a meat flavored chip worth actually eating, and, what’s more, they’ve done it without trying to use bacon.
Maybe that’s what works here. There’s no fake smoke taste, and no attempt to add a sour cream and onion component. The first notes are heavy on celery salt and onion powder (think Old Bay), but there’s a real miripoix and herb thing going on, and an enduring meaty depth to the potatoes that lingers on the way down (thanks, no doubt, to the monosodium glutamate.) Perhaps it’s because I’m accustomed to eating baked potatoes which have gotten a shot or two of roasted turkey fat, but the entire chip just tastes like a meal. A my-mom-just-slaved-in-the-kitchen kind of meal.
I don’t know if I’ll ever have a chance to procure these chips again, but if I ever do, you can bet I’m emptying the store. I’ve had one to many ‘meat’ flavored chips which just taste like salt and fake smoke and bad bacon, and now that I’ve had a flavor which actually kind of tastes like the impossible to replicate flavor profile it seeks to represent, I ain’t never going back.
Well, at least until it’s time for my next impulsive buy.
I can distinctly remember the first morning I walked into the “Junction” dining hall at Utah State University. A well-traveled, 20-year old east coaster looking to get my caffeine fix amidst a bunch of wide-eyed Mormon freshmen, I found myself out-of-place and gravitating away from the “hot options.” Biscuits and gravy, bacon, and omelets were never my style, and despite the various stations offering breakfast foods from every American culinary tradition, I more often than not would make a beeline towards the cereal bins.
And such began a two-year relationship with Utah’s State’s cereal options. familiar choices like Honey Nut Cheerios and Malt-O-Meal knockoffs of Lucky Charms and Cocoa Puffs were early options, but eventually, my more curious nature got the better of me. Coupled with the first time in my life in which I actually and willingly bought peanut butter on my own, you might say this created the perfect opportunity to dive into the world of candy as cereal.
Admonish me not friends, for I am well aware how I should have tried Reese’s Peanut Butter Puffs years before I actually did. But you know what? When I finally did try it at my college dining hall, I wasn’t blown away like Leandra. Sure, they were sweet and peanut buttery and chocolatey, but something about the crunchy corn nuggets didn’t strike me as worth a morning bowl. At least not over the likes of Marshmallow Matey’s.
I went for quite a while without eating Reese’s Peanut Butter Puffs, until an intriguing craving for Peanut Butter cereal (brought on by the new Multigrain Peanut Butter Cheerios) forced my hand at the grocery store. Given the availability of non-pretentious peanut butter based cereals, my choices were rather limited. And all due respect for the Cap’n, but he just doesn’t have chocolate in his Crunch.
I don’t know whether the Utah winter dulled my taste buds or if I’ve just evolved in my fondness of peanut butter, but I was completely wrong on Reese’s Puffs the first time around. A word, first, is in order about the box, and the Big G kid.
I love this kid, mostly because he reminds me of a character from my favorite childhood cartoon. Histeria! may not have equaled Doug or Beast Wars in terms of viewers, but I always found the semi-educational yet always musically clever series to be a must watch (especially in their rendition of military history). Anyways, back to Big G kid. Looking like my man Loud Kidington, he just happens to be the kind of “X-factor” of nostalgia and sentimentality that instantly earns a cereal bonus points in my mind. One step short of proving me with Star Wars themed marshmallows or a toy, this is about all I ask from a cereal box. That Big G kid’s eyes are rolled up in his head and that he lacks a lower set of teeth notwithstanding, I consider him a model of excellence every child should aspire to.
As for the cereal itself, I find it one of those few cereals which is equally enjoyable as both a snack and in milk. A kind of oily, sugary coating that smells of cocoa powder and peanut butter hits you with that signature Reese’s Cups intensity, and while you’ll never confuse the crunchy corn spheres for actual candy, the salty and hint-of-molasses exterior does carry with it that enjoyable mouthfeel of peanut butter and smooth chocolate. The taste is balanced if not perfected, with enough salt to let you know it has depth, and enough molasses taste to make you savor each piece. The cocoa strikes me as less harsh than Cocoa Puffs and more milk chocolatey — not necessarily a bad thing, mind you, given that we’re combining it with peanut butter.
I think one of the mistakes I made when first eating this cereal in college was having it in skim milk. BIG MISTAKE. Having experimented with coconut milk recently I can only tell you that enjoying a cereal with skim milk is like enjoying a trip to the dentist (read: not enjoyable in the least, unless you like anesthesia and bad jokes). In anything with some substance, however, the smoothness of the coating only takes on an even richer taste, highlighting the salty-sweet combo and giving you that signature chocolate and peanut butter explosion that takes you back to Halloween binges at the King size cereal bar people’s house.
Why I don’t buy this cereal more often is beyond me. Well, actually, it’s not. With so many options to choose from it’s easy to see how something like Reese’s Peanut Butter Puffs gets put on the backburner every now and then, but really, as a peanut butter cereal, is there any question it’s king? Granted, I havne’t had many (I am ashamed to admit I’ve never had Peanut Butter Cap’n Crunch) but I think this classic and award-winning combo just found its way back into my Top 10. And this time, I think it’s here to stay.
Reese’s Peanut Butter Puffs
Price: 2.00 (Giant, with coupon)
Ranking: 9/10
Chances I’d Buy Again:100%
Your turn. Best peanut butter cereal out there?And is Peanut Butter Cap’n Crunch better than Reese’s Puffs?
I wish I could say affirmations of faith and hope are always met with a reversal of fortune. They’re not. In fact, since my last reflections on the uncertainty I and my family are going through right now, things have only gotten more hectic and stress-filled. Death isn’t something I’ve had to deal with much in my life, and I thank God for that. But last week I received the news that my grandfather is in the late stages of terminal cancer, and is in the period in which the only treatment is, in the word’s of the doctor, “to make him as comfortable as possible.”
Death of a grandparent is something I’ve always known would happen, but the timing couldn’t be worse. My mom — God bless her — has started to go back to work at the medical center where she practices, and coupled with her job editing nursing textbooks and caring for my father on an almost 24/7 basis, she’s got more on her plate than a sumo wrestler at a rice buffet.
I’ve taken the recent events like a little kids who drops his ice cream cone. Between the family challenges and the weekly reminders of the poor job market (still no bites in the applications) I’ve lost my temper and my cool more than a few times, and have been finding my outlook on the world becoming more pessimistic by the hour. It doesn’t help that we as a country are in an election year, with the mud-slinging and doom-and-gloom of current events reaching epic proportions. Caught in this tempest of “woe-is-me, woe-is-the-world,” all I want to do is retreat. I want to hide inside my little world of food blogging or ice cream man work, pretending the problems at home don’t exist, or don’t really have an impact on how I choose to gace each day.
It’s hard to see rays of light in the storm right now, but every once in a while I catch sight of them. Just when I feel like I’m being rocked to a new and faith-deprived low, a sudden break in the rain allows a flicker of blinding sunshine to burst through. The rays are short-lived but intense, and the key, I’ve found, is to keep your head upand your eyes open. Because with your eyes closed and your head down, you’ll never even realize that they do come.
I catch sight of them throughout the week. In sitting down to write a letter to my grandfather, reflecting on a gift of a prayer book he once gave me. A laugh from my dad watching an Orioles game, the first in years in which he hasn’t come home distracted by work or life. A heart-to-heart conversation with mu uncle on the phone, in which I find out I’m not as alone as I think I am, and that he has been in my position too. A glance over at my mother sleeping in, knowing the work I’ve put in preparing us for the day is also allowing for her to recharge her body.
These are the rays in the storm, the charging battalions of hope sent against Divisions and Corps’ of despair. I can’t help but think it’s times like these where many fall away from themselves and all they believe. Maybe you are one of those people, or maybe you’re not. Yet as I got through these times I can’t help but falter again and again, only to be lifted up again and again. Why is this? I keep asking myself. Is it me? Is it my surroundings? Is it the people in my life?
Maybe it’s a combination of some of these things, but the more and more I examine them, the more and more they seem to point at just the opposite. If you know, and if you know where I am in my life, then you surely know that ‘resolute’ is not a word I’d identify with, and that optimism, hope, and yes, even trust and faith, are not virtues I exude or even easily embrace.
And yet, I’m so moved by those virtues that I can’t help but extol this Ray of Light in the storm, and I can’t help but feel, by some first-met, long-forgotten, often-heard-whispering promise, that God’s hardest tests are the ones we press on through when we feel like giving up. So I keep my head held to the sky. Letting bullets of rain hit me, all so I won’t miss the ethereal beauty of rays in the storm.
Friday was a momentous day for me. Taking a break from work, I instead went back to my high school.
As a substitute teacher.
Weird. With swirling thoughts and a dry sense of humor I got through my day at Mount Saint Joseph alive, but following the six and a half hour stint (was it really that long?) I knew I needed to decompress with a treat. Hello, Scoop Ahh Dee Doo.
This place apparently opened in down town Ellicott City a few weekends ago. Located next to a tiny artisan French bakery serving croissants as big as my head, it has all the makings of your standard artsy Ellicott City destination. Translation? A place tourists will love, and hippies and yuppies will flock too. Not being any of these, I came for the ice cream and the outdoor patio. And the Maple Bacon Ice Cream.
We’ll get to that in a sec.
Offering hard ice cream from Taharka Brothers (apparently a big deal) had some 17 flavors on the board when I showed up. standard offerings obviously were featured, but a few more exotic options (including Berger Cookie and the aforementioned Maple and Bacon) immediately caught my eye. Prices seemed reasonable for something so intensely “artisan,” and samples are offered.
Initial thoughts on my sample of the Berger Cookie are nothing but positive from the tasting end. The service? Not so much. The young lad at the window clearly lacks the same charisma I do as an ice cream attendant, and unfortunately couldn’t detail what a Berger Cookie exactly is. No matter, I later looked it up, and expected the description to match the delicious fudgey shortbread that was generously swirled in a rich, creamy, and intensely smooth vanilla base. Damn you, trans fats.
The Maple and Bacon didn’t sit too well though. I very rarely will throw something away that I pay for, but after a few licks I just couldn’t take it. The ice cream itself was solid. The maple flavor was mellow and none-too-sweet, although the texture seemed a bit grainier than ideal.
The problem was the bacon, which was just way too prominent Still a bit chewy and certainly smokey, it nevertheless overpowered the delicate creamy taste. I love salty and sweat as much as the next guy, but the interplay didn’t work here.
My first visit to Scoop Ahh Dee Doo left me a little disappointed, mostly because the service seemed a bit spotty, and the information about the product sparse. Still, the few clean licks I was able to get of actual ice cream showed promise, especially if more warm days are in order. Just do yourself a favor and sample the Maple Bacon before you blow your tips on it.
There are some times in even a serious cereal eater’s life when necessity supersedes novelty, and where the virtues of proper nutrition trump the temporary euphoria of a sugar rush or nostalgic cartoon kick of back-of-the-box fun. In these moments we’re reminded that we eat to live and not live to eat, and that the right nutrition can make all the difference between getting the job done and snoozing on the job.
The first morning of St. Paul’s Catholic Church’s hurricane relief mission trip to Biloxi, Mississippi was one of those times. Tasked with rebuilding an entire home destroyed by Hurricane Katrina, I knew I was going to need more than just sugar and high fructose corn syrup to power me through the day. Clearly, Kashi’s 7 whole grains and their protein-filled soy grits were going be needed for this morning. The question is would they be yummy enough to keep me content?
Kashi’s GoLean Original is the kind of cereal I imagine dieter’s stock-up on with religieuse-like zeal. With 140 calories, 10 grams fiber, and 13 grams of protein per serving a small bowl can hit all the nutritional must have’s, and truth be told, I’ve bought it plenty of times in the past. But contemplating on my bowl while in Biloxi, I realized I never ate the cereal plain. And, true enough to form, I found myself staring at a bowl while also staring at a yogurt and a banana.
Before diving into the complete-breakfast mix, I decided to focus on the flavor of the cereal itself. Textually you’re dealing with something that keeps you interested in every bite. The interplay between three distinctive crunch levels of fiber twigs, soy grits, and 7 grain mix keep mouthfuls from becoming monotonous, at the same time providing enough contrasting flavors to endear your spoon to one element over another. That being said, differentiating between those 7-grains seems beyond impossible, with hard-winter wheat , sesame puffs, and brown rice all coming together in what comes off as three or four slightly different versions of puffed wheat.
Six grams of sugar is hardly anything for a cereal with a serving size of 52 grams (most kids cereal serving sizes run at 28-23 grams) but somehow, Kashi GoLean gets the most of its sweetness. Perhaps it’s because the sweetness is coming from evaporated cane juice syrup, but whatever it is, the lightly sweetened pieces really augment the natural flavors of the various pieces that make up the mix. Believe it or not, not since the artificially sweetened Fiber One cereals have I enjoyed a cereal with such a low sugar content.
I read a comment on the Kashi website which said GoLean lacked a “joyful” flavor. On its own I’d say that might be true, but if you’re looking for a natural cereal as a base for a ‘proper’ breakfast, than this is your choice. Likewise, it makes a great base for customizable snack bags. Protein rich and dense, GoLean often finds itself combined with peanuts, dried fruit (I like figs), or some other sugar-laden kids cereal when I’m looking to munch on a mini-meal at work. Factoring in this superior nutrition, as well as its fair price (I often find it for $3 a box) and better-than-average taste and texture, it’s become a staple for me, and makes a strong case for the next edition of the Top 10 rankings. Not bad for something without a cartoon character or a maze on the back of the box.
Your turn. Got a “go-to” meal or healthy cereal? As yes, Lucky Charms counts!
